You see, when one is inflicted with a life-threatening disease like cancer, being sure and confident of oneself is so important. In my experience, it may even help save your life!
When I was first told I had cancer, as many people would in that situation, I refused to believe it. You then go through a whole host of 'mood' or 'character' phases... disbelieve - denial - anger - sad - depression - acceptance, etc. Then, you're surrounded with so many 'experts'. Well, first, there's the doctors. And herein lies your dilemma. These guys... what they say is gospel, man - no question. Or so I thought...
Then, there's people whom you love - your family, your wife, your children, your siblings. And your friends. I was fortunate also to have 'surrounding' me cancer survivors. Their opinions have to be taken seriously... I mean, they're survivors, right? What they did, what they went through ... I'd taken my hat off to these chaps. There was this guy, Raphael, who had brain tumour 13 years ago. He was given no chance by his doctors to live.. but this guy now plays squash at the age of 65 and beats guys half his age! He must have done something right to prove his doctors wrong.
So you can see that having a mind that can absorb all the advice thrown at you - by people who are 'experts' at what you are going through and how to go about it - and to be able to say to yourself '..right, I've heard from all of you.. now leave me alone, let me think about this.. and now this is the way for me.'
And I'll tell you something else that I'd strongly recommend - have a soul mate.
I mean, a real soul mate. She has to be a reflection of your very being! My wife, Hafidzah... Only God knows how much I love her. She has been a huge tower of strength for me. She is a reflection of my very being. This is one of the biggest reasons for my current condition.
Then, there's nothing like getting up at nights and praying to The Al Mighty. One of my prayers is Ishtikorah. This is a prayer asking God to give me conviction. To give me strength in making decisions. This is where I would say I had gained self assurance, 'yakin' as we Malays say it, without sounding arrogant or boastful. This inner confidence is so important to cancer patients, as one will be going through so many decision making cross-roads, some that may eventually lead to whether you live or whether you die.
I'd read a New Sunday Times (click here for full story) article about my battling cancer that was publish in the Focus Section this morning. It feels so good to be able to 'give' and share - in a wide sense - the experience that I had gone through, to the masses of people out there who may learn and gain some insight on how to manage cancer - their own, their loved ones or their friends.
And I must acknowledge the good work done by Hafidzah in getting the article published. Only Allah knows the rewards that are due for her in the hereafter, insyaAllah.
Thank you, sayang.
Nazlan.
4 comments:
Taniah,
Hemm .. I'm first in commenting.
OK, my hubby is colon cancer survivor too, stage IIB, offered FOLFOX, but only accepted FUFA in 2007. Me, a breast cancer survivor stage II, TAC regime and no radiation. We are C-duo survivors.
Ha, ha, ha, we survivors have many fantastic terms.
What about your chemo regime? FUFA or FOLFOX and did you receive avastin. From the cost I think probably you had received the same as my hubby.
Keep up the good work.
Has.
Dear Has.
OMG! Both of you? And survived? Now that's what I call a miracle.
We need to sit down together, I wanna hear your story. Would love to publish your story in our blog.
Hafidzah.
Dear Hafidzah,
God can give worse things...I feel blessed. Being cancer survivors for us, are better than being diabetic or other chronic illness. Semoga tidak kedengaran sombong, tapi we are humbled, really. I knew how it felt when death was close by (after TAC chemo). There was no work, no title, not even people whom you loved....we can be just on our own when facing the moment. But hopefully even being on our own, we are not alone.
I think me and hubby really a true match, commonest female cancer and commonest male cancer, one after the other. We are better people now and ever, InsyaAllah.
It was a regime I'd rather forget, but I think it was 5FU and something...plaxin. I went for 2 sessions of chemo for 5 days straight per session at Subang MC back in 2004.
My point is that I had managed to beat the odds not because of chemo, but by taking traditional medicine.
I have very strong reservations about chemotherapy - basically very much against it. But, hey, if it works for you and you're convinced with it, by all means. Like I said, conviction is the key, really.
Take care and regards.
Nazlan.
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